I’m turning 30 on Saturday.
I’m turning 30 on Saturday, and I have a baby.
I’m turning 30 on Saturday, I have a baby, and I have a mortgage.
I’m turning 30 on Saturday, got a baby, mortgage, and a full-time adult job where they expect me to show up on time, actually do some work, and make million dollar decisions. (ok, multi-thousand dollar decisions)
It kind of snuck up on me.
Yes, all of it.
One day, I’m jumping off the swings on the playground at school- the next, I’m turning 30.
I’m not necessarily sad about it, more surprised at how fast it went.
Next thing I’ll know, I’ll be making pancakes for my grandchildren on Christmas morning.
It goes by in the blink of an eye, doesn’t it?
My neighbors are sitting outside on their patio, with a small bonfire, watching a television they’ve hooked up to the outlet in their garage…
Why let nature interfere with your programs, right?
…including my summer off.
I start work back up next Monday.
Can you tell how excited I am? Cause I totally am…
Yeah.
Now, it’s not that I don’t like my work…Ok, I don’t really like my work.
More accurately, I don’t like the problems people present me with at work. If I could work in a vacuum, just doing my thing, getting projects banged out, with no little flies in the ointment, I’d be great. But that’s totally not my job. Or anyone’s job that I know.
Sure, I’ve been pee’ed on, pooped on, thrown-up on, and cried on in the last 10 weeks…and it’s still preferable than hearing a vendor messed up my print piece and our stock won’t be in for another two weeks.
I would love to be able to be the stay-at-home mom- and I know there are people who probably think I’m being selfish by NOT staying home with my baby…but we’re just not in the position right now to live on one income. Someday? Hopefully, but right now those pesky student loans need to paid each month, along with the mortgage and eating a couple of times a day…
I’m trying to convince myself that daycare is a good experience for Li. Socialization! New experiences! A huge tumbling gym I would never be able to recreate in our basement!
But it’s still hard.
I know I’m not the only woman who has had to deal with this- and I know I’m just one more person weighing in on the debate that has been raging for decades on which is better- daycare or homecare…I just wish that we didn’t have to decide. Some countries give women a year of maternity leave…A YEAR.
It still wouldn’t be enough for me.
