Typhoid Mary

I was planning on talking about my weekend- specifically our new-ish cabin in the woods and my eternal death match with all creatures of the blood-sucking kind*- but I got sick.

Or, as I like to say to my hubby, ssssiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccccckkkkkk.  With an emphasis on the whiney “iiiiii” sound.  It’s just not the same word without a bit of whine and sad puppy dog eyes added in.

Usually when I’m sick, I can soldier through with a minimum of complaint- but when I have a bad bug- or horrors of horrors- the STOMACH FLU- I fully admit that I revert to being a HUGE baby. 

Sick with a cold?  No. You are not really sick.  Buck up.

Sick with a sore throat?  Take a couple of year-old antibiotics and buck up.**

“Sick” (and I use that term loosely) with a weird rash?  First, ew.  Second, rub some cream on it.  Third, buck up.

But a fever with the added benefit of chills?  The kind that requires burrowing into my husband like Luke in a Ton-ton to get warm?  You would think I was dying.

And honestly- at 3:30am on Saturday night, when I was listing out the pros and cons of getting out of bed to go to the bathroom  (Pro- I don’t have to pee anymore!  Con- I’ll freeze to death before I reach the door!) the thought might have crossed my mind that I was dying of some mysterious avian-swine-moose flu variant I had stumbled upon, and therefore would always bear my name….

“Oh, you’re freezing, but have a fever and headache?  You totally have the Cotterpin flu…You have 24 hours to live.  Good luck.”

I’m fine now by the way.   Maybe I ate some bad Tex-Mex.

*Seriously.  WHAT THE HELL ARE THESE MOSQUITOS ON?  They are freaking HUGE- and they somehow have amassed an ARMY that launch a full-0n assault the second I step outside.  It’s not safe to leave the house anymore.

**Not that I would condone doing this…I’m just saying I know people who have… Ahem.

Categories: me, random movie reference, why? | 1 Comment

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One thought on “Typhoid Mary

  1. Pingback: Illness and Ickiness, Oh My! « A Cotterpin House

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