If you would meet me, you may think I’m a young-ish woman, but don’t be surprised when you discover I’m really a little old lady in disguise.   

Hus and my cell phone contracts are up this month- and it turns out that being out of the cell phone waters for two years is a long time in the cell phone world. 

My current phone is a flip Kyocera gobble-de-something- it has a camera, it has an alarm clock, it has Tetris, it allows me to make calls, and it allows me to send pitiful well-spelled text messages.  And that’s pretty much it.  

And?   I’m pretty much happy with it- except…the battery life dies in about 4 hours of it being on.  Which is troublesome when people want to call me during the day.

Which means a new cell phone is in order.

This particularly excited Hus because the end of our contract means that we can now get IPHONES!!!!!AAAIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!OMGOMGOMGOMGYAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!*

I’m a little less than excited about the new cell phone realm of possibility opening up before us.

First – for all those Appleheads out there- Yes, they are cool.  Yes, the technology is revolutionary.  Yes, I’m sure they’ve made your life SOMUCHBETTER…but!

1- I’ve heard they’re expensive-  expensive  monthly charges, expensive to get the newest technology, expensive when you drop them on the ground and break the screen, as I’m apt to do. And, I’ll just come out and say it, I’m cheap.

2- They don’t get the greatest reception- especially in my remote area of Milwaukee- only an hour outside of the wild west town of Chicago.

3- Once you’ve been inducted into the world of Apple, it’s a bit like George Orwell’s 1984- they know what, when, and how you like your music, friends, and life and have a product or app that will fit every need you didn’t know you had.

4- I’m a little tired of people no longer looking up anymore as they walk down the street, or walk over my toes, because they’re too busy looking at the “pop the bubblewrap” app on their iphone.

So, what’s a little old lady to do?  Buck the technology trend, and get the opportunity to be all smug when the machines finally start fighting back?  Get an iphone and only use it for- GASP- only calling people?  Or get something cheaper and regularly steal my husband’s to play games?

Any suggestions?

*my own interpretation of the excitement I saw in Brisket’s eyes when he found out about the ending of our contract.

Categories: random movie reference, snark | Leave a comment

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